Wednesday, 10 August 2016
TERRIBLE EVILS AGAINST MARRIAGE
When a man and woman seal their marital
vow before the people of God and priest, it is sealed till death. It is no news
that marriage is a union which is made valid by the seal of the marriage vow.
This is like a contract, and in every contract, terms and conditions always
apply. When this contract is broken the result is what I termed sins. Sins
against marriage are evils that have direct effect on marriage. Below is the
list of those sins:
- Divorce
- Unlawful separation
- Abortion
- Artificial Birth control
- Sterilization
- Adultery
o Refusing marriage debt
Though the list is not exhaustive but
these are the major sins against marriage which every marriage couple should
endeavour to avoid. Why are they specifically called sins against marriage? Let
me explain further…
DIVORCE
In the gospel of Mark 10:2-12, Christ
answers the Pharisees the question they ask him concerning divorce. He gives a
very fascinating riposte and I will like you to try and read the answer
yourself. Meanwhile let us continue. Divorce is considered in New Testament as
a grave sin. Anyone who divorces his partner and engages in another marriage is
guilty of adultery and even the one who marries a divorcee is also guilty of
such (cf. I Corinthians 7:29). So divorce is against the law of the Lord.
Whether divorced or separated, a
married person is not allowed to keep company with another (that is, having
sexual relationship). Married people are bonded to each other and they owe
their body to themselves; so going outside the bonds of marriage to share one’s
body with another (who is not in the bond) is a grave sin against the partner
and against God. In marriage one belongs to the other and this is why jealousy
is always manifest in marriage - one ought to guard one’s possession with
jealousy. So, divorce is a sin that offends both God and man.
UNLAWFUL SEPARATION
There is also another danger in
marriage, and that is the danger of unlawful separation. It is a mortal sin for
couples, whose marriage is valid, to be separated. Why is it so? Because when a
couple separates, there is a danger of adultery, or some other sex-related
sins. By the way, they are both owing each other the marriage debt. Also, while
both parents are separated, the training of the children will surely suffer the
dearth of one parent. But this does not
mean there are no considerations for married couples to separate. The church in
her wisdom and love allows married couples to separate when there is a very
grave matter (especially one which threatens the life of one of the partner).
And this permission will only be given by the local ordinary (Bishop).
ABORTION
There is a temptation in marital life
for couples to always indulge in this grave sin, either as a means to regulating
or spacing childbirth or for some unnatural reasons. But the church sternly
frowns at this and even God. Abortion is a wilful killing of an unborn baby.
The church has often emphasised that marriage and conjugal love are, by their
very nature, designed toward the begetting and educating of children. Hence, in
marriage, children should not be seen as an interruption in their conjugal love
but as the supreme gift of marriage and contribute substantially to the welfare
of their parents. In the words of Pope Paul VI, “each and every marriage act (quillibet matrimonii usus) must remain
open to the transmission of life.
One
may ask what if there is a danger to the mother’s life. In the mind of the
Church, no life should be considered greater or more important than the other.
Both the life of the mother and that of the child are of equal importance, and
thus to take away the life of any innocent human being is always considered as
murder. Medically speaking, abortion is not the safest and easy way out, as
people suppose it to be. There are many side effects associated with abortion.
Abortion can cause serious injury to the womb of the woman causing her to often
miscarry, high possibility of tubal pregnancy, sterility and even death.
It
has always been in the practice of the Church that anyone who commits this sin
of abortion is considered automatically excommunicated from the church,
especially when it is wilfully and intentionally done. By excommunication, I
mean that the person will no longer share in the sacrament of the Church and
cannot have the privilege of a Catholic interment. Nonetheless, the church
still gives excommunicated members the privilege to make amends and return to
the faith. That is why, for a priest to absolve a person who commit the sin of
abortion, he has to obtain special faculty from his Bishop. But there are
situations when the church, in her pastoral understanding and love, gives a
general faculty to every priest to forgive this kind of sin. A very good example is the faculty the Pope
Francis gave to every in this year of mercy to forgive sins of this sort. It is
contained in his bull of induction Miseriordea
Vultus.
ARTIFICIAL BIRTH CONTROL
This is the direct interruption of the
generative process. That is to say, any artificial attempt made either during
intercourse or after, in order to inhibit pregnancy. Although couples may do
this for therapeutic purposes, but the church regards as illicit means of
regulating birth, any direct interruption to the natural means of procreation.
Another danger to the use of artificial birth control is based on the idea that
the man may grow used to the use of the use of anti-conceptive practices, and
this may eventually lead to the man having little or no regard for the woman.
And so there will be a minimalized care of the physical and psychological
equilibrium of the woman on the side of the man. The woman will simply become
an instrument to supply the selfish enjoyment of the man and no longer a
respected and beloved companion.
STERILIZATION
By
sterilization, we mean every means used to make the reproductive organ
infertile. Let me explain further. Because of the fact that married couples
want to continue in their conjugal love, but having no intention or having made
up their minds not to bring forth any life from it, they resort to means of
preventing pregnancy. This is often seen in couples who already have “enough”
children of their choice, and also couples who want to space birth. There are
various means to try to achieve this; usually by vasectomy (cutting or tying
the seminal vesicles), tying or cutting the Fallopian tubes, or hysterectomy
(removing the ovaries or uterus). The church sees this sin to be mortal because
it inhibits the natural order and thereby infringing in the natural cause of
procreation. The only exemption whereby sterilization can be pardoned is in the
case of diseased organ which must be removed in the face of danger to the
health of the entire body.
Nevertheless,
a woman is never allowed to tie her tubes nor the man his seminal vesicles. Now
if there is a grave reason to do this, the church rather encourages what she
calls “periodic continence” – which means that the couple should only have
intercourse during the infertile period (safe period) of the woman each month.
Not even at the instigation of a medical practitioner should one make oneself
sterile.
ADULTERY
This
is one very popular sin I think everyone is conversant with. No one will want
to have an unfaithful partner. Adultery is simply, sexual intercourse between a
married person ad someone who is not married to him or her. This is very
serious sin in marital life and it has broken most of the marriages in our
contemporary time. There is a covenantal union in marriage which bonds the two
persons together and they become one body. Any alteration to this covenant is a
grave offense to the marriage partner and to God.
REFUSING MARRIAGE DEBT
When
the church talks about marriage debt, it means only one thing, which has
nothing to do with money or bride prize. Saint Paul teaches in his letter to
the Corinthians that the wife has no power of her body, but the husband. And
also, the husband also has not power of his own body, but the wife (I
Corinthians 7:2). Thus, in marriage, a partner owes his or her body to the
partner. This means that under the penalty of mortal sin, one is obliged to
offer sexual intercourse to his/her partner anytime it is reasonably asked for.
However, there are lawful reasons why a partner may refuse this marriage debt,
they are
- Sickness
- Adultery
- Drunkenness
- Insanity
- Non-support
- Danger to an unborn baby
This
does not suppose the idea that one should always insist on the right to sexual
intercourse. Marriage is and should always be cemented with genuine love and
not on selfish reasons.
As
you must know, this is just an added knowledge to what you already know about
marriage. For further clarifications and comments please make use of the
comment box, I will love to hear what you have to say about this and your own
convictions about marriage. Remember, there is love in sharing, knowledge
shared is knowledge expanded, don’t hoard this knowledge to yourself, share
this information to your loved ones and friends, therefore please use the share
buttons.
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this is a great and educative write-up. Thanks Paul for this exposure and do keep on feeding us with this pilgrim's food.
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